What Do You Serve Yourself?

Self-sabotage is better referred to as a bad habit.  I often get asked… “why do I keep making the same mistake over and over?”  Simply because it’s a habitual subconscious habit.  You aren’t even aware of it so you vibrate that energy out into the world and draw it to you.  Then you try to dress it up in a different setting and think it will be different.  When it’s exactly the same as your old repeated pattern.

Then you get your inner bully to tell you how bad you are and why you are no good at getting what you want.  This is really just repeating old habits that likely started when you were a kid.  Now the best way to look at this is to determine what experiences you are repeating that you are unhappy with.  This could be repeating money challenges, unhealthy relationships, poor health habits, etc…  Whatever it is, ask yourself about the last 3 times you had these experiences that you are unhappy with.  What went wrong with the experience.

For example if you repeat unhealthy relationships, think of the three people you have loved.  Now list in two columns:

1. Left Column: All the good things you loved about them.
2. Right Column: All the things you disliked about them.

When you look at the list, the left is all the things your conscious mind says this is what love should feel like, but on the right these are all the things your subconscious mind says you learned as a child what love really feels like to you.  We navigate life with our feelings.  So you are subconsciously drawn to that energy, unknowing that you are repeatedly drawing your image of love that you learned when you were young.  You aren’t intentionally trying to repeat these experiences, just repeating the feeling you are use to replaying. The qualities which are most likely not healthy such as insecurity, control, abandonment, neediness, abuse, emotional unavailability, etc… are experiences you learned as a child of what love looked like.  You saw it so many times it became imprinted in your subconscious mind as the vision of love.

The great thing is simple awareness of this image and if it was unhealthy.  Does it resemble the repeated behavior you are habitually making.  You can now start working from the things that you know are loving on the left side of the list and make them non negotiables.  Raising your self confidence and self-esteem so you stop self-sabotaging yourself by repeating old behaviors.  It’s hard to stop what you are unaware of.  Awareness allows you to catch yourself in the act faster and correct your course to what you want.

Repeating this same list in any area of your life helps you make your subconscious habits conscious.  Allowing you to intervene when you are struggling to make change.  This is loving yourself and giving yourself experiences you truly desire.  Asking yourself what you truly want and giving yourself permission to live the life you love and deserve.  Deserve: means to-serve.  What will you consciously stop and start serving yourself from now on.

Brightest Blessings

Daune