Will you hold out?

Relationships are funny because everyone has their opinion on how to find the right one.  Here’s the newsflash, you are drawing yourself in some way even if its just slight.  So if you want to improve your game on what you are attracting, improve yourself.

If you see insecure, manipulative, high strung, addictive, unloving or other traits in the partners you are drawing into your space, ask yourself….is there any part of that behavior that could be true for me?  Its usually more subtle, the undeserving person draws an unfaithful person.  Not equating that their believe of not deserving a committed loving faithful partner is present and so they draw in what they feel they deserve, an unfaithful partner.

Instead of looking at ourselves and why we draw poor qualities in others, we begin accusing them of their weaknesses and bad behavior.  This is what I call… Pain-Ping Pong.  Both people in the relationship begin handing their pain over to the other, if only for just a slight moment they will relieve them of their pain.  When the other is not interested because they have plenty of their own, you get a game of “Its not my Stuff, its yours”.  This is when you see unhealthy relationships last longer than they should because they have gotten use to their pain-ping pong game.

A simple remedy to this is to clarify what is truly important to you in a relationship and then stick to that plan.  Hold out for the person who has those traits and qualities.  This may take time if you don’t possess the same qualities yourself.  Thus…will you hold out?…for the right person instead of playing games with people who can not fill your desires in a relationship.

Take a look at people who enter your life and ask yourself if anything irritates you about them, this is what you should address first in yourself. Once you have healed that piece of you, does it bother you anymore?  If so, time to leave the ping pong match.  Look for someone who matches the clarifying qualities to you wrote down.  Don’s settle and hold out!  You Deserve It!

Brightest Blessings,

Daune